today...sadness, sickness

as i sit here and think of the loss the mom's of these girls are feeling, i am sick. it feels like a punch in the stomach every time when i think of them already having Christmas presents for them. waiting for them to come in after school and throw their book bags down and get on the phone from the girlfriends they just left. 8th grade graduation, drivers license, prom, graduation, college, marriage, grandkids, i am sickened in the heart. sickened by the hugs, kisses, tears of joy and pain these moms are not gonna get to share with the people who are supposed to outlive them. a terrible tragedy that has hurt the community and people you dont even realize. i know God has a plan. and sometimes pain is a part of that, but it doenst make it any easier to deal with. the only thing is that they dont have to wait a whole year to have the first the Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year, Valentines day without them. I am not a mom, but my heart aches and aches and is broken into many pieces for the loss they are feeling. and their families and friends. sometimes friends are your chosen family. and the pain of loss is just sometimes too much.....