3 weeks ago

3 weeks ago, it happened

 3 weeks ago, tomorrow to be exact

3 weeks ago...

a piece of my heart left

i stopped setting the table for four

i stopped hearing the singing in shower

i stopped fighting about homework

i stopped getting screamed at

i stopped getting the precious letters of apology

i stopped giving words of wisdom at bedtime

i stopped tucking her in

i stopped being upset about the messy bedroom

i stopped having to repeat myself over and over and over and over

i stopped having to answer those "embarrassing" questions

i stopped hearing her giggle

i stopped being jumpy waiting for her to scare me-again

i stopped hearing her amazing singing in the truck

i stopped seeing their dance videos they made while we were gone

i stopped being able to hug her ---

wishing the pain away while doing it

i stopped being able to tease her about boys-seeing 

her cheeks turn red

i stopped being able to smell her perfume

i stopped being able to tell her 

"that is enough hairspray" every morning

i started being able to pray for her more amd more

i started to realize even more how precious time is

i had to learn the hard rule --

"if you love them, you have to let them go"

i had to learn to love from far away

i still get out 4 plates (and put one back)

i still smell her secret crush shower gel her coconut shampoo-it's still in the shower

i watch the videos of her singing and 

dancing with an ache in my heart

i wish love was enough

i wonder if she feels my love 

i wonder if she only remembers the yelling between us

i will love her for the rest of my life

i wonder - does she hear me saying "i love you schmoopy" 

on her way out the door

i pray for her more and more

3 weeks ago, it happened

 3 weeks ago, tomorrow to be exact

3 weeks ago...

a piece of my heart left